The radio station that I listen to on my way into work is running a contest right now that is very Lichtenbergian. In honor of people who put off their taxes to the last minute, they are asking that people send in stories of procrastination. This can be a story where the procrastination resulted in either amazing victory or humiliating defeat. The winner will get to have their taxes done for free.
My taxes are already done, so I’m out of the contest. It did make me curious, though. I would love to hear the Lichtenbegians’ best procrastination stories.
This one is heavy. I need to think about how I will go about sharing my first experiences with procrastination in elementary school and with the regular big quarterly “reports” we had to present.
One way would be to describe it in such a way that the reader finds it a “funny” childhood memoir.
Or I could evoke the terror and the pathos and feature my father’s desperate attempts to help me pull something together the night before.
Or I could try to accurately convey my absolute dislocation of self, the total lack of ability to lock in to the reality of the task. As a writing challenge (to be met or avoided) that’s the most interesting. It’s in the same world of experience as my time with some child psychologist who tried to engage me through sharing an activity. I think he wanted me to suggest a game or some creative thing like drawing. I couldn’t find it in myself to propose anything, so we would up bouncing a red rubber ball back and forth.
JB calls it “holding out.” He just needs to remember to bring along a rubber ball and then there would be no problems.
A special story about procrastination? That would be like Shamu writing a special story about water, or herring.
Maybe I’ll do this tomorrow. Cras melior est.
Pingback: The Lichtenbergian Society » Blog Archive » Assignments: recap