The Lichtenberg Murder

New York, New York.   The strange case of what has been called the Lichtenberg Killer seems to have been solved with the questioning of a suspect from rural Georgia. Terry Maiers from Carrollton, Georgia was taken into custody concerning what seemed to be a recent murder in New York City.

A body was found last week with a crest left behind.  After first thinking it was a murder scene police soon learned that the body was stolen from the local morgue and was not the victim of a murder. Someone had tried to make it appear a murder had occurred. On the crest was the picture of Georg Lichtenberg, an 18th century scientist and aphorist, with The Lichtenberg Society written across the top and Cras Melior Est (Latin for Tomorrow is Better) along the bottom. A  simple Google search found that there was such a society on line and it was in Georgia. Further investigation led police to Mr. Maiers as the sole perpetrator of this hoax. In fact Mr. Maiers freely confessed and assured authorities that his fellow members knew nothing of his plans. The police confirmed that Maiers acted alone and that the Lichtenberg Society was harmless.

In fact it appears that the Lichtenberg Society is a satirical venture begun by a small group of talented actors, writers and a composer who all but one chose other vocations for their lives. They chose Lichtenberg to be their model because of his tendency to procrastinate. The group has even copied some of Lichtenberg’s own procrastinations by writing the first page of a Fielding like novel, with no intention of finishing it. The group does endeavor to produce some creative thinking, but frowns upon anyone actually being successful or famous.

Thus it seems strange that a member of such a society would create such an elaborate hoax in New York. When asked why he did it Maiers replied,”I read in a book where a man should do three things in his life: love a woman, write a book and kill another man.  I was stuck on number two, so I thought I would go on to number three. Then I could devote all my time to writing my book which would be about my fake killing.” Asked why he came all the way to New York to fabricate this hoax Maiers said. “New York is where every thing happens. It gets all the attention. And this will really irritate my fellow Lichtenbergians.”

Apparently Maiers left the crest behind to draw attention to the group. In an ironical twist he may have done so at the price of his own membership. The by-laws do not mention murder or even faked murder, but they do emphasize that members should not be too successful in any of their endeavors. By actually planning and then carrying out his hoax Maiers may have broken the by-laws and thus be eliminated from the group. When asked to comment the President of the group, after first reiterating that the Society had no part in the fake murder nor were any of the other members aware of what Maiers was planning,  said they would have to consider things as no one in their group had received this kind of notoriety before.

Mr. Maiers will have an insanity hearing before they decide what charges will be filed relojes especiales.

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4 Thoughts on “The Lichtenberg Murder

  1. Harmless??

  2. But otherwise, well done, sir, well done!

  3. Terry on March 8, 2008 at 1:16 pm said:

    I actually hesitated using that word, then put in it deliberaately as that is how an outside authority figure would see us. It is not myn opinion at all.

  4. So now I’m thinking, maybe Jack the Ripper was also a Lichtenbergian. A bit extreme and uncharacteristic of our gentle good nature, I realize, but why should Masons have all the fun.

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